Questions And Answers On Self-Esteem
What is self-esteem?
You have surely heard of self-esteem ,. It is about the assessment we make of ourselves about our thoughts, feelings, and experiences that we have throughout life.
Can self-esteem change over time?
Indeed, self-esteem varies throughout our life, depending on our personal situation, work, our emotional state, etc.
We can say that when there is a match between what we think, what we feel and what we do, our self-esteem is higher.
How important is self-esteem?
It is very important to have good self-esteem. Low self-esteem is a factor that often triggers other issues such as insecurity, anxiety, depression, eating disorders, alcoholism, obsessions, etc.
Is it bad to have a lot of self-esteem?
Having good self-esteem doesn’t mean being selfish. Some people confuse self-esteem with selfishness and these are different things.
Selfishness is constantly thinking about us, regardless of what others think, feel, or expect from us.
Conversely, a good level of self-esteem pushes us to see ourselves as unique and different, with our qualities and our faults.
People with good self-esteem take risks, make mistakes, and learn from them. They take into account the opinions of others, but always defending their rights, their ideas and their opinions.
They have confidence in themselves and if there is something they don’t like or don’t like, they try to fix it.
How do I know if I have low self-esteem?
Low self-esteem can be detected when we consider that other people are better than us and that we only have flaws (hopefully a few virtues but removing all their merits).
We do not give our opinion for fear of rejection, we seek the approval of a third person, we avoid responsibilities, we feel insecure, we do not believe ourselves capable of doing things well, we are afraid of failure, etc.
How can I assess my level of self-esteem?
For example, you can make a list of your strengths and weaknesses. It is important that you try to strike a balance between the two lists.
No one is perfect and we all have positive qualities and areas for improvement.
It is important to keep in mind that we develop in different contexts (friends, work, family, acquaintances, strangers, etc.) and you may behave the same in each of these contexts.
Analyze these behaviors carefully and look for their qualities. Remember that the same quality can be positive for you while for others it can be seen as neutral or even negative. You can also take a professional self-esteem test, like Rosenberg’s.
And the big question: how can I improve my self-esteem?
1 – Don’t compare yourself with other people because each person is different. Don’t take negative comments from people who don’t really know you too seriously.
2 – Don’t confuse self-esteem with being arrogant or selfish. Having self-esteem puts you in a position where you understand and accept that each person is different.
3 – Identify your fears and mistakes and deal with them. We all make mistakes, but the most important thing is finding a solution and learning from those mistakes.
4 – Learn to say NO and to express your opinions and desires without fear, always in clear language, without offending the person with whom you are speaking.
As an Indian proverb, “There is so much good in the worst and so much bad in the best that it is absurd to condemn anyone”
And you, do you have good self-esteem?
Image courtesy of Salah Ghrissi
