The Fear Of Suffering Is Worse Than The Suffering Itself

Emilio Duró, in one of his most famous lectures, called “Optimism and Illusion”, tells us that 99% of everything we care about is not made up of things that have happened or are to come.

Indeed, a large part of our suffering and its causes comes from inside our brain.

Most of the time, we are just afraid of suffering.

Fear is a very human reaction, which is part of our natural survival instinct, but there are times when it betrays us and gets activated in situations that do not represent a real danger.

In these specific situations, we must learn to control our fears.

We tend to suffer more from the mere idea of ​​suffering than from an event that can cause us real suffering.

Many people are afraid to love or fall in love for fear of suffering afterwards, and hide behind a shell to protect themselves, without realizing that they are thus forbidding themselves to be themselves and to know the true love.

How fear works in our brain

To find out how fear works in our brains, researchers at the University of Texas Mental Health Center in Dallas, United States, decided to conduct a study.

They were able to count on the participation of 26 adults (19 women and 7 men), aged 19 to 30.

The experiment carried out was relatively simple: the scientists showed the participants 224 random images, among which were real images (divided into dangerous images and pleasant images) and fictitious images, completely abstract, which did not represent neither the fear, nor stillness.

They asked participants to press a button with their right index finger when they saw an actual photo and to do the same with their right middle finger when they saw non-real images.

The experiment took place under the control of electroencephalograms.

The EEG results revealed that the threatening images caused an early increase in theta wave activity in the occipital lobe (the area of ​​the brain that processes visual information).

Then, an increase in theta activity of the frontal lobe (which is in charge of higher mental functions, such as decision making and planning) was also observed.

Similarly, it has been proven that increased beta waves occurred in the brains of test ed, which shows a clear relationship with the motor behavior.

Scientists have come to the conclusion that the brain prioritizes threatening information over all other cognitive processes.

The experiment then shows us how this information is processed by our brain.

Don’t be afraid to suffer anymore

To stop being afraid of suffering, there are no magic formulas.

There is no way to achieve this and forget everything that might be happening in our existence, but some thoughts can help us to put aside these fears, which are often totally irrational.

Choosing to no longer be afraid means managing our emotions and preventing them from dominating us.

For this we need to know ourselves better and be at peace with ourselves. It is important to carry out a process that allows us to reflect on our feelings and the reasons for them.

Identify your suffering

To fight against the fear of suffering, it is essential not to fall into denial and to be aware that we are suffering.

In this sense, to achieve an objective view of things, we can observe ourselves by taking a step back, to realize what we are thinking, when we think it and how we react to it.

In the same way that this introspection is necessary, we must also carry out an external observation, looking at our body and trying to understand what we are trying to convey.

At this point ask yourself: what is my body trying to express? Listen to your body and identify the reasons for your suffering.

Choose not to suffer anymore

Once you have done this double internal and external analysis, it is high time to decide to stop suffering.

For this you can start by leaving aside negative thoughts that regularly invade your mind, like: “I could never get over this”, “I don’t deserve it”, “I don’t have enough time”, “ It’s not worth it”.

Beyond these negative thoughts, it is also important to overcome all those limiting thoughts that can feed your negative view of existence.

Here is an example: “Suffering for love is the best way to prove that I feel true love”.

Leave aside all these negative beliefs and you will gradually get rid of all the suffering that invades you to continue your path to happiness.

Express what you feel

It is quite normal to be afraid of pain and also to be anxious about having to express it in front of other people.

But not expressing our deepest emotions, such as our fears, is not a good thing.

We need to be courageous and honest with others, as well as with ourselves.

Saying what we feel, putting words on our fears, are acts that require great courage because they allow us to break down the barriers that limit us and unload the weight that makes us suffer.

By doing so, you will finally be able to enjoy all the finer things in life.