Guilt And Worry: How To Get Rid Of It?

We spend a good part of our time feeling guilty and worrying. Often these two emotions disconnect us from the present moment; we feel guilty because of something we have done and we worry about what we could do, thus forgetting the present.

Two bad habits: guilt and worry

Guilt and worry are part of our bad habits, and although they are two different emotions, they are actually two extremes that can be put on the same level.

Indeed,  when we feel guilty because of something, we do not take advantage of the present moment because we live through something that belongs to the past. On the other hand, when we worry, we live through something that could possibly happen in the future, and over which we can therefore have no control. But these two emotions have one thing in common: they disconnect us from the present.

To regret something that happened yesterday and to be afraid of what might happen to us tomorrow is enough to drive you crazy. Many people feel bad about something they shouldn’t have done, or are scared just thinking about things that may happen to them. This description can correspond to any of us, without exception.

The guilt process

Society perpetually sends us messages of guilt and worry and generally speaking we have been brought up in such a way that for us these emotions are normal.

Someone sends a message so that we remember that we did not always do the right thing by acting or not acting in a certain way, by feeling or not feeling such an emotion, or by saying or not saying such and such a thing. It is by feeling uncomfortable in our lives that we respond to this message, and we therefore become guilt machines.

Guilt can be one of the most unnecessary emotions we can feel. We waste a lot of our energy feeling guilty about things that have happened in the past, and we persist in living through things that no longer have any connection to the present. Yet what is done is done because we cannot change the past.

Learn from our past experiences

We must know the difference between guilt and lessons learned from our past experiences. Guilt, as we have said before, is a disconnection with the present, which can lead to mild discomfort such as deep depression. It forces us to act today, because yesterday we did not have the right behavior.

We are wasting our energy by making ourselves feel guilty about something that has already happened, which we consider to be unnecessary and harmful to ourselves.

But learning from our past experiences allows us to stop having certain behaviors in the future, and pushes us to learn from our mistakes while continuing to move forward … which is not the case when we feel guilty. Learning from our mistakes is something healthy and necessary for our personal development, because it allows us to move forward.

Some tips to stop feeling guilty

Guilt is an unnecessary emotion that only keeps us from moving forward and enjoying the moment. This is why it can be of great help to us to try to see the past as something immutable. A feeling of guilt, whatever it is, cannot allow us to solve a problem, because we cannot change the past.

– Determine precisely what you were running away from in the present when you were living in the past. Thus, the more time passes, the less you will feel guilty.

– Forgive yourself for certain actions that you may have had and that you have hidden from others for fear of disturbing them. You have to approve of your own actions, and so the guilt you might feel when others don’t approve of them will go away.

– Keep a logbook in which you will list all the situations in which you have felt guilty, making it clear that by dint of worrying yourself about the past, you have wasted precious time and wasted the present. Acting in this way will give you a deeper insight into your guilt.

– Show those close to you, as well as those who may have manipulated you by using your guilt, that you are capable of dealing with the disillusions arising from your behavior. It will take a long time to see the results, but you’ll find that things have changed when they see that they can’t make you feel guilty.

Go forward ! Use the past as a springboard rather than getting stuck in it.