Habits That Suffocate, Fears That Imprison

Habits protect us, but sometimes they can also become a real prison.

The fact of establishing habits in our life prevents us from making certain decisions on a daily basis, decisions that we should nevertheless take if we had not already established some fixed habits.

These habits involve a certain mode of operation, which results in a pattern of thoughts and feelings that do not change.

The price to pay for habits can be very high ; of course, they are necessary, and allow us to manage our daily life. However, and imperceptibly, they lead us to take refuge there and be afraid of change.

“It is not the violent evils that mark us, but the insistent and tolerable evils, those which are part of our habit and which undermine us meticulously like time.”

-Emil Cioran-

We all know people surrounded by habits, but who never go well: they sigh, take their heads in their hands, and say that they are bored because the days pass and are alike. However, neither do they feel invested with the force to say “stop”.

Thus, to overcome the dictatorship of habits, it takes a good dose of courage. In addition, it is essential to have a strong motivation as well as sufficient self-confidence to be able to break this pattern and venture down the path of uncertainty.

The bewitching effect of habits

The worst thing about establishing habits is not to maintain them, but that the more time passes, the more we will become insensitive, and this without even realizing it.

It’s not that we stop feeling things, but rather that we end up cataloging what we feel. You start to feel that anything that is unfamiliar is dangerous; novelty and difference become a kind of threat.

The habit is a scaffolding made up of many parts. It goes from the way we manage our schedules to our conception of the world.

We end up believing that we have to feel, think and act in one and only way, that we understand all of reality and that it is therefore no longer worth asking questions.

Habit reduces your curiosity and decreases your capacity for surprise.  But, above all, you become deaf and blind to your own potentials. You end up believing that you are only doing what you can do and that it would be impossible for you to act or live otherwise.

The result is then a certain state of drowsiness. With habit, you just want to meet your needs, and not necessarily grow or be happy. And the worst part about it all is that you start to see the habit as your great achievement and you are afraid of anything that can alter it.

Fear of change, resistance to change

Living with passion is a real gift that many cannot or do not want to take advantage of. It is about feeling a genuine interest in the work that is developing. Genuine love for the people you bond with. A real enthusiasm for the plans for the future as well as for all that remains to be done.

Why then do so many people see life pass before their eyes and try to “burn time” rather than live intensely? There can only be one answer: it is fear that imprisons us and pushes us to use our habits as a shell. We therefore refuse to face the new, the unknown, the provocative.

Change is this: a challenge. In the face of conventionalism, habits, and security emanating from doing the same thing sometimes so as not to have to think too much. Even when the habit results in a number of unpleasant situations, many still tolerate it, because the fear of change is stronger. This would mean stepping out of your comfort zone and having to sharpen your abilities to cope with unfamiliar situations.

 How to overcome the fear of breaking out of habits?

Everyone should do what they want, the way they want to do it, with whom they want and where they want. No one should have to resign themselves, work, or live in a way that doesn’t suit them, just out of fear of change.

Of course, you can’t send everything out overnight either. Such behavior is still possible, but most people need to take it more gradually and calmly to get there. It is obvious, however, that the best solution does not always consist in breaking with everything that surrounds us; it suffices in fact to find certain spaces in order to be able to be oneself. But how do you get there? Where to start ? What to do in order to successfully get rid of these habits that imprison us?

• Take time for yourself: as demanding as your job is, it can never be as important as yourself; you need to devote time exclusively to yourself. It’s those times in your life when you only have to do what you really want to do: sleep, eat, dance, whatever you want. The important thing is that you feel that all the things you do, you do them with envy.
• You must play: the game must never be dismissed. It is fun, a space of freedom par excellence. When you play, you recreate, you rebuild new definitions of yourself. Play cards, play basketball, whatever you want, but play.
• Do not lose touch with nature: nature has a highly positive effect on emotions and thinking. This is why it is very important that you seek to come into contact with the green of the plants, and that you get closer to the particular mode of communication peculiar to animals. Nature allows us to focus on what we need to improve.