Life Will Give You Everything You Need If You Think You Deserve It

When we accept, understand and internalize that we deserve to be happy, life opens the way for us. The days orchestrate new opportunities, locks open and enemies turn into statues of salt that the wind carries with it. Nothing can stop us when we feel we deserve joy, and no one has the power to oppose our wishes.

Emily Dickinson said in her poems that we don’t know our height until we stand up. The curious thing about all of this is that often education, society and those around us tend to prefer us to be seated, submissive, silent and obedient.

“If you do what you shouldn’t do, you will have to suffer for what you don’t deserve.”

-Benjamin Franklin-

Indeed, this is precisely what happened to the Massachusetts poetess, whom disappointments, fears and sorrows forced to remain recluse in her room at the family home in Amherst, becoming little more than a warm shadow, a thin face that the neighbors saw behind the windows. Of her 1,800 poems written, she saw only about ten published and of the people who were part of her life, she loved only one, but neither was brave enough to take the plunge.

It was other times, of course. It was other mentalities, of course. But, the complex universe of emotions, insecurities and lack of self-confidence is a refrain that is still relevant today. It’s like a videotape that never stops, brings us the magic of an occasion and lets it go, teaches us what happiness is and then takes it with it, leaving us alone. -e with our desires, our sorrows, our memories and our regrets.

The regret of not having dared “something more”, of not having fought, of not having felt deserving of this unique opportunity, of not having gathered the necessary courage for this lost love…

You deserve a better life

Anna has started going to the gym because she wants to have a healthier life. She goes there every day from 7 to 8 p.m. but she continues to smoke two packs a day. Marthe just ended a very troubled emotional relationship a month ago, and since then she has been addicted to Internet dating sites, with the obsessive idea of ​​finding “the ideal partner”.

All of these examples can be summed up in a central idea that we all know: while we find balance in one area of ​​our life, we retreat considerably in another. It’s as if we don’t understand that we deserve a better life, and that often causes us to stop caring for ourselves in a more full, honest way. Why are we doing this? Why don’t we accept to take control of our reality to achieve well-being?

The answer to this question lies not only in our past, but also in the inability we show when it comes to taking care of ourselves, building our psychological well-being and above all, dealing with our own emotions. . In all three examples, we saw that each of these people does concrete things: one is going to play sports, the other is looking for work, and the last has ended an unhappy and complex relationship.

However, the rest of the behaviors give rise to these black holes so frequent: anxiety, uncertainty, fear of the future, the inability to be alone, addiction to a substance… We all know- s that we deserve a better life, but we don’t know how to listen to our real needs, those that are on a more intimate, deeper level of our being …

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Have confidence in yourself, because being happy is not a need, it is a right

Life will only bring us more opportunities if we put one foot in front of each other and go out looking for them. Happiness will knock on our door only if we are receptive, if we are attentive, prepared and above all… willing. Because whoever gets carried away by fears and insecurities wrecks on the island of lost opportunities. Because whoever surrenders to disappointments will sooner or later choose the same physical and mental confinement that Emily Dickinson inflicted on herself.

“I guess I’m not like Emily Dickinson, who kept her prettiest things wrapped in ribbon in her drawer.”

-Jeff Bridges-

In these times when you can find happy pills on Twitter and Facebook in pretty phrases, there is something we should not lose sight of. Something rivals of the followers of positive psychology remind us: we must learn to accept painful experiences, no matter how difficult they are. A farewell, a disappointment or a failure are things that we have to assimilate no matter what. And once you’ve plunged into this chaotic abyss of negative emotions, it’s time to emerge, and we’ll do it with more force. By feeling more valid.

And in our daily complex and full of demands, we must internalize that we deserve not only to feel good, to be calm, to experience satisfaction, freedom, triumph and a taste for joys. All its dimensions are in reality RIGHTS. Because whatever your story, where you come from or who you are… We all have the right to be happy and to choose our way of being.

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