The 4 Qualities Of A True Friend
“Friendship is a soul that lives in two bodies”
Aristotle
Friends, it is a pillar as strong as it is eternal in our lives. They are our life companions, in a way.
We all know that friends don’t just help us when we need it. Studies confirm that solid social support increases our life expectancy.
But often doubts arise. We then wonder what is the difference between a true friend and a simple acquaintance, or what are the emotional conditions available to this friend that make him unique and that make him enter the category of “best friend or brother of heart”.
According to Robert Rowney , psychiatrist and director of the mood disorders unit at the Cleveland Clinic, certain habits distinguish true friends from fakes.
The 4 qualities that we are going to tell you about in this article will allow you to differentiate a true friend and an acquaintance.
Of course, we must add to these four indicators the confidence, as well as the ability to speak the truth or to see the reality in the face, even if in principle, it hurts us or is unpleasant to us.
What are the 4 qualities that distinguish a true friendship from other relationships in our life?
1. True friends motivate us and help us accept ourselves.
We all tend to be very hard on ourselves, and therefore not have constructive thoughts.
For psychiatrist Rowney , a true friend helps us to be positive when we are in the dark. Indeed, he says that “people feel better when they are surrounded by close friends, who give them support and motivation when they need it”.
If we are too hard on ourselves, these close friends will tell us that this is not the best behavior to adopt.
“True friends allow us to naturally strengthen our self-esteem. On the other hand, helping a friend will also make us feel better about ourselves ”.
2. When we are right, they recognize it. They know they want the best for us, and if we make a mistake, they quickly notice.
No one is perfect, and our friends manage to recognize our mistakes and share them with us, so that we can learn from them.
“They recognize our failures and our successes, and in both cases, they support us as they should.”
Subtlety is one of the characteristics that a truly special person has in our life, which occupies an important place in our daily life.
“A recent friend or one of whom we are not very close will not risk telling us something that could bother us, while a true friend, someone in whom you really believe, will know how to find the words to tell you this. that you need to hear. Having friends who are clear and direct is very important ”.
3. You can count on their help and support.
One of the amazing characteristics that your best friend has that they will be happy to share with you is their great care and ability to continually worry about you.
“A true friend is there for you, and your needs are theirs,” Rowney says .
To find out if a friend is really interested in you, you can do a simple little test: when you are together, see if they are using their cell phone or if, on the contrary, they are putting it on silent.
A study carried out in the United Kingdom in 2012, showed that if we consult our cell phone while we are with someone, it can easily distract us. But, that, your best friend will not allow himself in front of you.
4. They listen to you with the heart. While chatting with someone, they often can’t help but change the subject to talk about them.
But, as we all know, the conversations we have with our true friends are neither monologues nor soliloquies.
Establishing an open dialogue with someone helps strengthen the relationship.
Paul Sacco, doctor and professor in a school of social work at the University of Maryland, says the secret to a balanced conversation between two people is to actively pay attention to what the other is telling us. .
In the HuffPost Healthy Living , he also stated that “People who are good at listening to others validate their feelings. They show them that their words have meaning and that they are worth it ”.
