The Feeling Of Guilt Related To The Inability To Breastfeed

It seems that “missions” that mothers must fulfill as soon as they hear the news exist in the process of motherhood. On the other hand, those who are associated with this type of missions must make a lot of decisions that are not simple. These would be kinds of stages of motherhood that women study in depth as they face a new and exciting world in which they have a lot to learn. Choosing to breastfeed or not is one of those big decisions.

Each woman will have her reasons for choosing breastfeeding or artificial breastfeeding. On the one hand, there are those who defend the fact of breastfeeding and on the other, those who do not want to or cannot. More than generating a debate on breastfeeding and artificial breastfeeding, the aim of this article is to address the feelings of guilt that some young mothers may feel who, for one reason or another, do not have could breastfeed. These are mothers who dreamed and who had the conviction to breastfeed their children but who could not do so.

The feeling of guilt for not being able to breastfeed

There are different medical reasons that can justify the decision not to breastfeed: diseases of the mother, poor milk production, very painful process and mastitis, etc. This moment supposes a significant psychological impact because two very powerful trains collide: the innate need of the mother to feed her child and the impossibility of doing so in a natural way.

If we translate this to real life, we may have to face episodes of absolute frustration. On the one hand, the crying of the hungry baby and on the other a desperate mother who tries by all means to feed him. Breastfeeding which, for one reason or another, is inconclusive.

A mother once said that she was afraid when she would have to feed her son. In this case, we are talking about a mother who produces a lot of milk but suffers from superficial injuries that prevent sucking both from a baby and mechanically.

The suffering and pain was so intense that she one day wondered, “But why do I have to feed him?” “. Cracked nipples with bleeding, continuous tingling, mere contact with clothes, it was all an ordeal. Today, many of these mothers still feel assaulted by not being able to take more. “Well, if you’re fed up …” a midwife told him one day.

When to Quit Breastfeeding

Seriously, is this really useful? In my opinion no. Has he ever tired? The stress that is being passed on to the baby at this time, the totally visible anger, is much worse than depriving him of all the benefits that breastfeeding entails.

During the first months of life, the moment of feeding is a moment of bond, of union, of emotional benefit for the mother and for the baby. Forcing yourself to endure the pain can only lead to the opposite. The baby will receive all the discomfort while he is in his mother’s arms.

When you reach this point and after the mother decides to stop breastfeeding, it is time to choose the best possible milk. They are completely safe and are of no risk to the baby. The pediatrician will be in the best position to advise parents on this subject.

Breastfeeding is an option, not an obligation

It is certain that breastfeeding greatly facilitates the emotional bond between mother and baby. On the other hand, it has been proven that the fact of not breastfeeding will in no way prevent the bond from forming.

There is something that goes wrong in our society: when a mother feels judged and defeated because she cannot feed her child in a natural way, it is often others who make her feel that way. “In any case, she will do it correctly, the important thing is to be quiet in order to be able to transmit peace and security to the baby.” I believe this message should be the one received by women.

Either way, no woman should be or feel judged for her decision knowing that the baby will be healthy. In fact, all mothers should support each other regardless of their decisions about breastfeeding. Each woman is herself and her circumstances, she and her experiences.

To you, whom I don’t know or perhaps know, don’t feel bad for having had to opt for bottle-feeding. I assure you that your experience as a mother will not be less, you will not be less a mother or a second level mother for this reason. This option will give your baby everything he needs and you can give him all the emotional benefits that come from creating a pleasant climate when the child has to eat.

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